Friday, April 22, 2011

There isn't an App for this

In my life I've learned there are many things that, if I had to, I could live without. Warm showers, Major League Baseball, sun-dried tomatoes and reruns of Saved By The Bell to name a few. I'm not saying I'd voluntarily give these things up, but if pressed to do so I'd survive.

There are a handful of things whose absence would cause a great deal of inner turmoil and distress. First and foremost would be my wife and children of course. Then come things like golf, the Google, opposable thumbs and movie trailers. But sadly I've learned that nestled snuggly between the latter group and my family is the greatest invention since the BLT, the extension of my hand and brain, a device without which I'd have to fill my down time with silence or thinking, my one and only iPhone.

I got my first iPhone nearly 2 years ago. I was immediately impressed with this little gadget and felt compelled to write about it (

Since then we've only been forced apart twice. The first came when a firmware update bricked my first 3G phone and I had to leave it at work overnight.

That's when we named her Mariah because I spent the evening singing, "I can't live, if living is without you. I can't LIIIIIIIIVE! I can't give anymore..."

You get the picture.

Then, again yesterday an update on my 4G phone took far longer than I thought and I had to leave her while I went to lunch. I instinctually reached for my phone about 75 times during our meal. It was only then I realized I have a problem.

There've been warning signs along the way prior to yesterday's lunchpocalypse. My wife has questioned me often about why I've turned to Mariah from time to time. I sensed she both envied and despised Mariah for her capabilities.

Another event that gave me pause was when my 1st grader was assigned to draw a picture and write a paragraph about our family and my iPhone made the picture (in my hand of course) and the write up.

"My Dad has a iphon my favrit game is Tom the tocking cat it's fun!"

Don't get me wrong I work hard to be a loving and attentive husband and father. I work hard at my job, sometimes, and have many varied interests and do my best to fulfill my calling at church.

The problem is my iPhone has the ability to tie in to all of those things. Taking pictures of our family hike, BOOM iPhone. Finding a place to eat or movie show times for date night, BOOM iPhone. Making reminder calls to the scouts before a campout, BOOM iPhone. Looking up the name of an actor from a show you just watched, BOOM iPhone. Sending and receiving emails while away from your desk, BOOM iPhone. Listening to music while tracking your time, pace and calories burned on your daily walk, BOOM iPhone. Checking a score before bedtime, BOOM iPhone. Entertaining/distracting an upset child, BOOM iPhone. Finding out what's new on Facebook, BOOM iPhone. Your turn to read at family scripture study, BOOM iPhone.

Writing and posting this blog including the picture I just took? That's right, BOOM

Sent from my iPhone

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